Atheist Physics Teacher

In my local paper, The Long Island Advance, there is a weekly (as is the paper) segment titled From the Archives of the Long Island Advance, in which they present some news clips from 100, 75, and 50 years ago. A lot of the news is so mundane that I find it to be very funny. I hope that you do too.


From 100 years ago:

• Ira Rogers’s bull dog Jumbo was run over and killed by
  an auto.
• About a dozen Tungsten lights on Main Street, between
  the village limits and Swan River, were turned on by the
  Patchogue Electric Light Co. They are the first to be placed
  in the recently organized lighting district.
• At the Unique the contest to decide the most popular
  young lady in town stood as follows: Esther Smith, 175;
  Edith Nugent, 239; Eunice Foster, 189; Fanny Smith, 49; Sadie
  Ginocchio, 61; Nellie Gibbons, 169; Hilda Webber, 32;
  Lottie Link, 100; Mayme Vanderpool, 51; Clare Marran, 54;
  Fanny Budd, 97; Lillian Davis, 2; Nellie Ackerly, 8; Roselle
  Daly, 5; Edna Webb, 4; and Virginia Ullman, 10.
• Thomas B. Camidge has purchased a power vacuum
  cleaner on wheels, run by a gasoline engine. He will take
  orders for cleaning houses. This is an innovation that will
  be welcomed by the ladies.Mr. and Mrs. John Romanski left for a trip to Germany
  and expect to be gone three months.